Friday, April 10, 2009

Vintage Dame Goes Possum Hunting

Last night my adorable dog Leroy brought me the cutest Easter gift - a Possum! That's right ladies, a live possum! Just what a girl needs to liven up an otherwise low-key evening at home. As I sipped my Sauvignon Blanc and turned the pages of my Twilight novel, (totally addictive), I saw Leroy and little Quinny breeze through the kitchen on their way to their favorite perch - our bed. But, I could have sworn that I saw something else too...there had been something in Leroy's mouth!

For the love of God! Why why why? The one night I'm home alone, enjoying the quiet, Leroy decides to become Besties with Mr. Possum! Dashing into the bedroom I see Leroy looking up proudly at me - aren't ya proud of me mama?! Quinny took one look at my face and took off, the girl knows when it's time to leave a party. The possum was either dead or "playing possum," but I feared dead, as there was the tiniest bit of blood near his mouth. Ugly, wretched, these words do not properly convey how nasty that possum looked. And yet...I felt bad for him. Had Leroy accidentally killed him? He clearly had just wanted a new playmate. I also couldn't help but notice that Mr. Possum was lying on my beautiful color blocked Indian quilt. It's been in the family for 20 years. Argg!

After throwing back my entire glass of wine, I felt a little peep of courage. I quickly, but gently Quilt-Wrapped the possum and walked confidently out to the backyard. I lay him down softly and opened up the quilt a bit, fluffing it up "just so" around him, so that I created a little "Possum on Indian Fabric" Tableau Art Installation. I then said a few prayers, b/c two years of Catholic School never leave you, plus it was almost Easter, so Jesus was on my mind. "Dear Jesus/God/Goddess of Backyards, I apologize if my dog Leroy killed your Possum, he only wanted to play. I hope he did not suffer at all. Perhaps he is not even dead and he is just up to his usual tricks. Please bless the little Possum. Amen" As I prayed, Leroy and Quinny sat by my side silently, as if we were all in church.

The next morning the quilt was Possum-less! Yes! It just goes to show you that even when you're a girly girl like moi, you can rise to the occasion and become a tough broad when you need to!

Happy Easter!

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