At my wedding rehearsal dinner my brothers, Tommy & Mike, read excerpts from Good Housekeeping's "The Good Wife," published in 1955. I think my brother's dry delivery of the hysterical lines was the highlight of the wedding - that and the relatives & friends who were smoking weed on the gorgeous patio of the stately & historical Chateau Laurier Hotel. Check out these words of wisdom...
"Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed."
**Does Amy's Organic Spinach Pizza & a home made salad count as a "delicious meal?" My dinner specialties all involve un-packing cardboard boxes, which I always dutifully put in the recycling bin - does that win me any points?
"Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people."
**I usually look more weary than him. Lately I have been wearing his t-shirts with my paint stained American Apparel yoga pants around the house. But I do keep my skin nice and clean and fresh!
"Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it."
**I do sing many made-up show-tunes for him, which he seems to enjoy immensely
"Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables."
**Well, I love clutter and I have never met a surface that I didn't want to cover in old fashioned trinkets. Although I do make the bed in the morning - does that count for anything?
"Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours."
**Hmm, where do I even start with this one?
"Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him."
**I do always offer him a cold compress. It is my belief that a cold washcloth on the forehead can solve just about anything.
Although I have failed miserably at being a "good wife," I have a plan. I shall tackle one issue a week. This week I must banish my paint stained yoga pants and oversized tees. I need a stylish lounging outfit for around the house. It has come down to three bold options, two from Victoria Secret and one from Blue Velvet Vintage:
Lounge Lizard Goddess in Emilio Pucci, from the Blue Velvet Vintage website
Fabulous 1940's-ish silk wide leg pants from VC
Chic caftan from VC
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